Opportunity Parenting
‘They left that place and passed through Galilee. Jesus did not want anyone to know where they were because he was teaching his disciples…They came to Capernaum. When he was in the house, he asked them, “What were you arguing about on the road?” But they kept quiet because on the way they had argued about who was the greatest. Sitting down, Jesus called the Twelve and said, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.” He took a little child and had him stand among them…’ (Mark 9:30-36 NIV84)
I learned a lot in this passage about real life and parenting. I like first that Jesus saw the need to take his disciples away to teach them. Sometimes as families, we need to hide away together for opportunities to teach lessons that cannot be taught in a crowd. A day at home, a day away, a special time to create the opportunity for a teachable moment. For our family, a week away with no outside influences can do us a world of good.
I also love how they are walking on the road together and there is a conversation going on between the disciples. Jesus is listening and knows their hearts are not right, but He does not immediately address it. God convicted me as I read this that I need to learn to pick my teachable moments for the big things of life a little more patiently.
Jesus waits until they are alone together in the house to address the problem. Oh, how I need to do a better job of making the confrontation timely and private. Not only timely and private but note that Jesus asks a question first instead of giving a lecture: “What were you arguing about on the road?” This gives the disciple a chance to think, feel conviction, and respond. I need to learn to ask questions. Lessons, talks, and solutions do have a place, but I know I have overused them as a parent. Sometimes a question followed by silence can bring great results.
Observe that Jesus’ goal in asking the question was not just to hear an answer. He asked because He wanted to reveal their hearts and teach them what it really meant to follow Him. Maybe the disciples said nothing because they knew they were wrong. They had been arguing over who was the greatest. They were self-focused, not God-focused. I know I can relate. How about you? Do you ever argue out of selfishness? Do you compare, compete and push to be noticed? Position and power are the flesh’s chief concerns. Humility, meekness, and service are kingdom concerns.
It gets even better…. Jesus sits down calmly and then speaks with very few words, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.” Instead of a lot of words, Jesus provides a visual. He calls some little children over and has one stand among them. He gathers the child in his arms then and makes the point to welcome, serve and take time for what the world tosses out as unimportant. Serve without the goal of gaining position or attention.
This passage leaves me praying:
I learned a lot in this passage about real life and parenting. I like first that Jesus saw the need to take his disciples away to teach them. Sometimes as families, we need to hide away together for opportunities to teach lessons that cannot be taught in a crowd. A day at home, a day away, a special time to create the opportunity for a teachable moment. For our family, a week away with no outside influences can do us a world of good.
I also love how they are walking on the road together and there is a conversation going on between the disciples. Jesus is listening and knows their hearts are not right, but He does not immediately address it. God convicted me as I read this that I need to learn to pick my teachable moments for the big things of life a little more patiently.
Jesus waits until they are alone together in the house to address the problem. Oh, how I need to do a better job of making the confrontation timely and private. Not only timely and private but note that Jesus asks a question first instead of giving a lecture: “What were you arguing about on the road?” This gives the disciple a chance to think, feel conviction, and respond. I need to learn to ask questions. Lessons, talks, and solutions do have a place, but I know I have overused them as a parent. Sometimes a question followed by silence can bring great results.
Observe that Jesus’ goal in asking the question was not just to hear an answer. He asked because He wanted to reveal their hearts and teach them what it really meant to follow Him. Maybe the disciples said nothing because they knew they were wrong. They had been arguing over who was the greatest. They were self-focused, not God-focused. I know I can relate. How about you? Do you ever argue out of selfishness? Do you compare, compete and push to be noticed? Position and power are the flesh’s chief concerns. Humility, meekness, and service are kingdom concerns.
It gets even better…. Jesus sits down calmly and then speaks with very few words, “If anyone wants to be first, he must be the very last, and the servant of all.” Instead of a lot of words, Jesus provides a visual. He calls some little children over and has one stand among them. He gathers the child in his arms then and makes the point to welcome, serve and take time for what the world tosses out as unimportant. Serve without the goal of gaining position or attention.
This passage leaves me praying:
“Lord how I need your help to parent like you. To take time away to see each day as an opportunity to serve, instruct, use calm and concise words, and take time to illustrate life. Give me strength and grace to stand and forgive. Give me the humility to show mercy and love even when it is hard. You are enough and can help me love anyone through anything! In Jesus Name, Amen.”
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